Disgruntled

Several things happened this morning that has left me feeling disgruntled, unsatisfied and in complete discontent.  First, I woke up with what I am going to call a “sour” stomach.  That means, it wasn’t upset, but didn’t feel the best either.  Just off kilter enough to make me fully aware of it.

Second, I was booked for a speaking engagement the last Sunday of this month, and was just informed by email that that date had been given to someone else. 

Third, while messing with my computer and back up files, I backed up a thumb drive instead of the information I wanted backed up and in the process “lost” about two years worth of information. 

Right now, I am not too thrilled with what is going on and I am having to think back to what I have been thinking that created this chaos for me.  And I think that is what the problem is.  I haven’t been thinking.  My mind has been on a “holiday”. 

I just found out that when a professional painter or tile setter misses a spot or finds a mistake, they call it a “holiday.”  Since I have been missing several days, I think my mind really has a holiday.

Since everything in life is a gift, I am going to take advantage of this gift and just get quiet, accept it all as a necessary part of my life and release it into whence it came.  I am going to take my own advice and relax, allow, accept and release.  

Think Expansively

Few people think things through.  Few people realize that thought creates the experiences in life.  Few people think through what quick-fix choices have on long-term events. 

Recently, I was able to visit and spend time with some friends that I have known for over 30 years.  What was amazing to me is that we have been able to stay in touch even while all of us have moved cross-country and back. 

What I realized more than anything, is that I have always been able to think what my decisions would have long term for me.  Money is a good example of what I am talking about.  One friend decided years ago that she was going to retire and because of it, has very little money for what I am going to call “comfortable living conditions.”  She doesn’t have any savings and now needs some medical work done and she can’t afford it.  Not only that, she wonders why I want to go back to work.  Well, I want to be able to afford more wonderful experiences during this life journey.  I want to be able to afford whatever life presents to me whether it be medical or having enough money to take a road trip or a dream vacation.

Another friend is just to “tired” to learn something new or to take the class that will move her up the salary scale in her career.  Yet, she complains to me how she doesn’t have enough money to do what she wants to do.

Another didn’t pass a journeyman’s test that would take her to the next level and she just gave up.  In essence, she gave up on herself.

One thing I have discovered about myself is that I don’t always “get” what I need the first time I read or see something.  But I have learned that if I write it down or read it two or three times, it suddenly “dawns” in my mind what is going on. 

I can’t afford to give up on myself because I don’t have relatives willing me their estate funds when they die.  This life is up to me.  That is why I have never had the luxury of “not” thinking through the consequences of my thoughts.  I encourage you to think farther down the road than just around the next corner.

Adjusting

Adjusting to Oklahoma City is a variable experience.  Some days, it is all blue skies.  Others are windy.  Some days are with blowing rain and chilly temperatures.  This is what spring is like here. 

What is hard to adjust to is the constant layer of dust on all of the furniture because the wind blows most of the time.  I am not enamored of cleaning in the first place and having to do it everyday just goes against my grain.  Well, I guess I am going to have to get use to it.  My Swiffer duster is getting some regular use.

Someone told me recently, to ignore it and wait for two or three days because it will always be dusty.  This way, it is worthwhile and makes a bigger difference.  Really?

The delight of my experience here is that I have met some wonderful women who feed my soul with knowing wonderful places to eat, love to chat and laugh a lot.  What a pleasure hanging out with positive, upbeat and happy women. 

Am also looking forward to taking some sewing classes at a technical school nearby later this summer and fall.  They do classes in all sorts of interesting things that I don’t know how to do.  A nearby community center teaches line dancing, Palates, and stretching classes.  All of these are another way of stretching my possibilities into great opportunities to experience more of what life is all about.

Being here has also given me the opportunity to read and explore more of my library, allowing me to finish some of my craft items and I am ready to do more jig saw puzzles and build a new Lego building.  All of these activities are pleasure items that feed my soul and allow me to want to explore new fun things to do.  Right now, life is good.

What's Next?

In my preparation work for delivering a guest lecture tomorrow, I found several quotes in my research that have the same theme.  This one is from Dr. Stuart Grayson, “Ideas can change the direction of life, move the consciousness from despair to hope to upward flight.  Ideas are power.”

“We already live in a Perfect Universe but It needs to be mentally seen and spiritually experienced before It can become a part of our everyday life.”  Ernest Holmes

“…true prayer is letting go of the problem and being receptive to the transcendent solution that already exists within you.”  Eric Butterworth

“Trouble is valuable opportunity.  Experience is priceless instruction.  The Will of God for you is always something joyous and fine.”  Emmet Fox

As you know, if you have been following this blog series, that we moved to Oklahoma City to accommodate a new career position for Alan.  The company he went to work for, picked up most of our moving costs, paid him a signing bonus, and made it very worth while for him to accept the position.  My thought – wonderful!

Last week, Alan came home and said that he quit his job!  WHAT!?

You did what?  Okay, if we are in the middle wilderness of Oklahoma and you don’t have a job, why are we here?  Certainly not to just experience one of the most exciting hail storms I have ever gone through – hail the size of golf balls!  We had a ice pile three feet high in our back yard that can off of our roof during the storm and it took three days for it to melt. 

I am so ready to find out the “real” reason we are in Oklahoma.  I am sure that it is something great, wonderful and joyous because we are here in our right place at the right time.  I am open and receptive to knowing how that is revealed to us.  

Just Be Friendly

I signed up and showed up for another class in knitting.  I don’t think I have ever been as stunned as this woman who taught the class.

First of all, the yarn shop is selling very “high” end yarns that have been imported from all over the world and, to me, seemed very expensive.  All fine and good if you are creating something that you want to keep and treasure.  But I just wanted to practice on some plain, domestic wool.  Not to be had in this store.

We gathered in a room of about 12 women and suddenly, this woman is telling us what to do.  I had not ever seen her before so had no idea that she was the “owner” of the shop.  She didn’t introduce herself, nor did she introduce any of us to each other, and just assumed that we all knew each other.  She had one of her employees assisting us and told her to “teach” our table and she would take the other.  Then she constantly came over to “take over” and tell us what to do.  I found her very rude and overpowering. 

I left the class wondering if I ever wanted to shop with her ever again. 

When I signed up for the class, I specifically asked what supplies I needed to bring.  I did.  All of it wrong for the class.  Needed circular needles instead of the straight ones I had, and needed to bring a cotton yarn/thread to use as a guide thread.  Fortunately, I had a very nice young lady sitting next to me and she supplied me with what I needed in order to be in the class.

I kept wondering what it was about not giving the correct instructions on what to have or bring.  I, like most knitters, have duplicate and triplicate needles of all sizes from steel, to bamboo, to plastic.  I didn’t need to “buy” any more.

I realized that as I was driving home that here was someone who had built up a business but had no “marketing” skills at all.  But then I realized that it doesn’t take any marketing skills to be friendly and make someone feel at home.  This was a great lesson for me and reminded me that I need to smile more at all people.  I just need to be friendly.

Learning Lessons

While reading a book yesterday, I came across this quote from Peter  Ouspensky, a prominent Russian philosopher and writer of the early 20^th century, who use to ask his students who got upset about the insults, gossip, and actions of other people (I translate “criticism”), “Is there truth in what that individual said?”  If the answer was no, Ouspensky would say, “Well, then, why should you be disturbed?  Stay focused on your purpose.”  What is your purpose?  To identify mentally and emotionally with harmony, peace, wisdom, understanding, success, right action, and beauty.  It’s as simple as that.

In other words, what people think or say about you is none of your business and what the above tells me is to pay attention to what my truth us and to stay focused on what I need to do to feel good about myself.

I have noticed that I  sleep better when I have done something that feels good, done something where I have learned something, moved my body in exercise, and when I feel that I have completed what I needed to do that day.  And it really helps if I take the time to record some of what happened during the day in my journal.

It is said that every night Columbus recorded the activities of the day in the ship’s log and then added, “Today, we moved westward.”  He paid attention not only to the complaints, illnesses, mutiny threats, but also the progress they made.  I sometimes forgot that the most important thing to record is the “progress” I made. 

How soon we forget but it is the most important thing to record.

Yeah for May

(I wrote this article for a recent newsletter submit.)

The month of May is a favorite for many of us because it celebrates and stimulates us to colors, growth, and mild temperatures.  All of which makes me want to walk the parks, listen to beautiful music, play with my puppies, and do what gives me pleasure.  All of this in an effort to remind us what is important in our lives – to nourish, nurture and support ourselves into our highest and best.

The April issue of the Science of Mind magazine has an article by Dr. James Rouse in which he mentions a line, “Live by design.”  How wonderful!  How many of us know don’t know what that is? Do we live our lives by design or by default? 

Sarah Ban Brethnach reminds us that, “We may need to reacquaint ourselves with the material and deeply comforting dimensions of Divinity, in order to learn how to mother ourselves.  And the best way to start is to create, as an act of worship, a comfortable home that protects, nurtures, and sustains all who come there – including you!”

We need to nurture ourselves in order to enrich ourselves and others, to have reasonable expectations, to give more than we receive, to feel comfortable in receiving, to receive with great feeling and gratitude, to indulge and take pride in ourselves and others, and knowing that the good we receive is deserved and owned.  The more alert and sensitive we are to our own needs, the more loving and generous we can be toward others.

“Learn to praise yourself for the qualities you want to develop,” Ernest Holmes tells us.  “Be as kind and encouraging to yourself as you would be to anyone else working to improve.  Your whole life - thought, body and emotions – will soon respond to the praise you give it and you will develop the good qualities desired!  Remember, you are always planting something.”

In order to take better care of yourself, here are some points to think about:

1.    Believe in yourself.  Make a list of your best qualities and focus on them.  Read it often to remind yourself how wonderful you really are.

2.   Do something new.  Doing new things reminds you that making changes are in your hands.  You are in control. 

3.   Laugh and play a lot.  Laughter jump-starts the immune system, so never feel guilty about having a good time or having fun.  Put off the chores if necessary, they will always get done – eventually.

4.   Treat yourself.  Doing something special for yourself sends a powerful message, “I am so worth it.”  Pedicures and foot massages are wonderful.

5.   Renew relationships.  Call a long-forgotten friend.  Remembering your past is like renewing your soul.  Take advantage of it.

“The essential element in nurturing our creativity lies in nurturing ourselves,” teaches Julia Cameron.  Through self-nurturance we nurture our inner connection to the Great Creator.  Through this connection our creativity will unfold.  Paths will appear for us.  We need to trust the Great Creator and move out in faith.” 

All of this assists us to “live by design.”  And all of this helps us to create a higher quality of living.  Take the time to think about your life and where you are headed.  Create a life that is worthy of living.