Dealing with Challenges

Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.  Carl Jung

Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed of an equal or greater benefit.  Napoleon Hill

As we bring ourselves to a greater vision, we induce a greater concept  and thereby demonstrate more in our experience.   ...little by little we can unfold our consciousness, through  the acquisition of greater and still greater mental equivalents, until at last we shall be made free.  Ernest Holmes

Several weeks ago, I received a phone call from a good friend of mine asking that I pray for her as she was in extreme pain and needed some help.  I said, of course, I would pray for her complete comfort.  I asked when she was seeking medical help and she indicated the following Monday.  Tuesday, I called her and asked her what she found out.  After numerous tests and an MRI, they discovered that she had Stage IV cancer that started in her breast and had moved throughout her body and into her bones and had created tumors on her bones.  Her prognosis was about six more months of life.  She told me that she decided to forgo Chemo and all of the other treatments and would have her doctor enroll her in Hospice instead and she would live out the balance of her life at home.  

When I got off the telephone with her, I was numb.  This can't be happening to someone I have loved for close to 35 years.  She and I went through ministerial school together and have managed to keep in touch all of these years through our travels and living experiences.  

When I told Alan, he immediately asked if I wanted to travel to see her.  I said yes, and we immediately checked our calendar to see when would be a good time to go and decided on a date.  I called her to tell her the news and she replied that she would be delighted to see me.  We finalized our plans and made our reservations were all set.

Two days later she called and said she didn't want to see me and she felt that we were good enough friends and that I would understand.  I said I did and she said that she was very tired and needed to rest so we hung up.

Now, I am beyond numb.  I am shocked and I didn't know what to do with this.  I thought we were "good" enough friends that she would want someone "like" me to share some time with before she made her transition.  

With all of my training, I knew that what I was going through and feeling was my own "stuff."  I was hurt.  It was hard for me to feel any compassion for her right then.  

Going back with my experience with my former husband as he was making his transition with cancer, I remembered some of the stuff he said and experienced and I realized that I had taken what my friend told me "personally" and it wasn't meant to be that way.  This was her stuff - not mine.  This was her choice and what she wanted to experience.

Even though I got that what she told me was what she needed, I had a terrible time with it and getting myself back into a place of peace and greater understanding.  

The benefit of all this is that we decided to take that time that we blocked off our calendar and we are taking a trip east to tour some states that neither of us has ever visited  The fact that I am still healing from my last surgery, it is a good time to get away and rest and be still and have a complete change of scenery.  

I am blessed beyond measure that we have the ability to pick up and travel when and where we want.  Lots of prior planning in our early lives, saving money, investing money and getting ready for this time has afforded us the luxury and affluence to do this.  We prepared our Golconda.  Have you?