Paradise Where?

Voltaire understood that "Paradise is where I am."  Wherever we go, we carry the universe within us, feeling deeply connected to everything.  Alexandra Stoddard

Often wondering what the Kingdom of God looked like to me, I realize now that I never thought "big" enough.  I would come up with one good idea and I never went beyond that thought.  I now ask, what was I thinking that I thought only one idea was enough?  Where in the world did I come up with that so-called truth in my life?  Or, who told me that and I accepted it at face value?

And it is hard for me to accept that living in Oklahoma is "Paradise" for me.  Granted, we have had lots of great opportunities living here and certainly have improved the quality of our lives, but "Oklahoma"?  

There is also an element of fear of being here - nature is loud, in your face, with lots of variety.  Two weeks ago, we had a storm shelter installed in our garage.  It is a hole dug through the concrete, with a steel box set into the hole, lined with more concrete round the edges, with a sliding door on top.  When the door is open, there are stairs leading down into it with not a lot of room.  But when the next tornados are circling, it will be a comfort to have a safe place to go.

But what to do about the earthquakes?  Earlier, this week, we had 4.5 that reminded me of the quakes we experienced while living in California.  No where to go, no where to hide, and nothing to do, but ride it out.  

I realize that my Paradise Kingdom is filled with variety and that the only way to feel connected and safe is to open that doorway and allow Infinite Presence to hold me close and keep me safe.  I also realize that Infinite Presence will also provide me with wonderful discoveries that surprise and delight me.  Thank you God for all.

Digging Deeper

Understand that the smallest act of kindness, be it a kind work, a smile, a light touch of affection of simply an energetic presence can greatly alter the course of someone's life and, in fact, the world.  The shift in energy that occurs at these times is far-reaching and quite powerful, and so it is quite important for you not to withhold your energy from kindness.  Frank Talk

The 16th of this month, I had reconstructive mouth surgery.  I needed a tooth pulled that had decayed under the gum line and in the process of looking that what else needed to be done, we decided on implants to assist what teeth I had left.  Today is the first day I even felt close to my normal self.  What was so painful for me is that the dentist peeled back my upper gum tissue, smoothed out the bone into one straight line (which he was extremely proud of yesterday after viewing my ex-ray) and then covered it all again with gum tissue.  

Needless to say, being in such pain precluded anything including kindness.  It took all I had to just be civil.  I would get up in the morning, rinse my mouth with some really vile tasting bacteria killer, take a heavy duty pain killer, head for my favorite recliner and was asleep again in minutes.  Opiates created some other problems for me but are too private to disclose.  

The "good" that has come out of this is that I have easily released 10 pounds to date and I am sure more to come as I need another surgery in about 6 to 8 weeks.  

During my check up yesterday, I wished I had brought my little Yorkshire Terrier with me to have him bite the dentist on the ankle.  It is hard to be kind to someone who induces this much pain.  I know, this was my choice, but I didn't want all of the pain to go with it.  

My compassion level has certainly increased for others who are in chronic pain all the time.  I don't know how they do it.  Delighted that I am off the high powered pain killers, off the antibiotics, and finished with the vile mouth rinse, I can get my life back to a more normal way of being.  I am ready for health.

This experience has given me a greater sense of my health and what it is to feel fully comfortable.  Thank you, God and all of the energies and powers that be, that have assisted me through the process.  

I invite you to take full stock of your body and truly appreciate what you have.  I am sorry for me that I have lost some of my teeth, but I truly appreciate the technology that has produced the processes for the replacement of them.  Thank you God for all of the elegant blessings in my life.

Grief

Grief happens to us in strange and interesting ways.  For whatever reasons, I am losing another tooth.  The fact is, I have been losing teeth since my early 20's.  Having had a large space between my two front teeth, a dentist decided that the best thing to do was to put me in braces to move the teeth closer together.  In the process of moving them too fast, both died.  Out they came.  Gradually, over the years, more and more have had to be removed. 

The one that I am losing next week, has put me into a funk that is clearly different for me.  I am having four implants put in and a new upper appliance will be built for me.  

Doing lots of reading to "comfort" me and to give me the courage to face what I need.  This one reads, "Each moment gives us a fresh breath of air, an opportunity to take to heart, to face reality, and bravely move on."  Not much comfort in that!

How long will it take to get through this dark place and space?  Nothing feels safe right now.  But I do feel as though I am doing my best to move forward under less than desirable circumstances.  My faith seems to have skipped a beat in all of this.

What I have been doing is a lot of praying for peace, calm, courage and feelings of well being.  Several times a day, I turn my concern over what has to be done, into the heart and hands of God.  Intellectually, I know that all will turn out well.  My stomach doesn't feel it at all.  

In the meantime, I will keep praying and I invite everyone who knows me well to join in the process of my complete healing in comfort, ease and grace.  Thanks for all.

Watch your Reflection

"Your life may be the only Bible some people read."  Unknown

That quote usually stops me in my tracks. Since I grew up in a very dysfunctional environment, I sometimes don't know what the "normal" thing to do.  

I know that Ernest Holmes talks about "A normal healthy mind reflects itself in a healthy body."  But what is normal and what is healthy?

Several times I have been up against what is the best thing I can do in this situation.  I have had to stop and think, "What would God do in this situation?"  

Arthur Schopenhauer once said, "Everyone takes the limits of their own field of vision for the limits of the world."  I keep having to remind myself to look beyond what I am seeing or what I am experiencing because there is always more.

Since I am of God or I am in God, I am constantly asking the question, "What is God up to here?"  Am I open to the surprise and delight?  I was created to flourish and am I doing that right now?  

Since I have the potential of God within me, I ask for the power to recognize it, accept it, and carry it out. 

What a difference just a few minutes of thinking can do.  I invite you to engage your mind to so the same. 

Fulfillment

Over the years, I have kept a journal for wonderful quotes and things I want to remember.  When I take the time to go back and re-read what I have written, I am impressed all over again.  

I don't know who or where I found the following, but I want to share some of the items with you.  (I now keep track of the source of the quotes or references of where I have received the information).

1. Get out of your own way.  Eavesdrop on God and see or hear or get the imagination working to find out what great dream God has for you.
2. Let it work through you.
3. Accumulate pages, not judgments.
4. Be grateful for all of what life brings to you.
5. Show up for life.
6. Watch for the surprise and delight.
7. Do what's in front of you with excellence.
8. With intention, ask for what you want.  With attention, walk the walk.
9. Every detail has been planned for your enjoyment.

Watching for the surprise and delight is something I forget about - probably because I wasn't raised with joy, or happiness, or anything close to delight.  All of these are now emotions that I have to create for myself in order to get how fulfilling life can be.  

I am sure that one or two of the above are something you need to work on in your life.  I am willing to work with mine while you are working with yours and together, we can get this done.  There is that unknown substance that when more people are working on the same thing, group consciousness allows for the increase exponentially.  It's that Biblical thing about "where two or more are gathered."  I am willing to do whatever it takes to get to the place of God consciousness in my life.  How about you?

Learning More Lessons

I am in a situation which is very uncomfortable and am in a position in which all I can do is accept what is.  It makes me angry because I cannot trust the person involved in this.  

Years ago, I read a book by Joe Vitale in which he gives a formula for forgiveness.  The steps are

I love you

I'm sorry

Please forgive me

Thank you.

May McCarthy uses one that is similar.  Her steps are

I bless you

I love you

I forgive you

I release you.

Several issues come up with me when I am using either one of the above processes for a forgiveness exercise.  When I am in the situation, I do not love the person.  When the transgression is against me, I am not the one to be sorry (except for me being in the situation).  And I realize that forgiving is for me to release and not for the other person.  Being grateful is the last feeling I have.

Blessing someone is equally as difficult when in the situation.  Loving them?  Forget it.  Forgiving, okay and releasing is fine, too, as long as they are released out of my life.  

In order for me to move on, I have revised the above steps into my own version of being able to best move on from the situation.  

I accept you

I forgive you

I bless you

I release you.

I accept that I got myself into this situation and I have to admit that I don't like it and have to ask myself, "What could I have been thinking?" in the beginning.  I accept that you are not the person I thought I could trust and depend upon for keeping your word.  I didn't know that you didn't know how to do that.

I forgive you for being the way you are and and I forgive me for even getting into this kind of situation.  I accept that I have to accept the situation for what it is and that nothing is ever going to change it.  As one of my students use to say, "It is time to suck it up and move on."  

I bless you into your higher good whatever and wherever that is for you. 

I release you out of my realm of existence.  I am more than ready to sever whatever strings are attached to us and I no longer want to have anything to do with you.  We are done!  It is over.  I am complete.

There is not a "formula" for anything in life that fits all of us.  Sometimes we need to take a better look at what we have accepted and realize that we need to come up with our own way of doing things.  All of us are individuals and we sometimes don't fit into the "cookie cutter" way of doing things.  

This whole exercise taught me that I have to think for myself.  I have to think about what I am getting into, how this is going to effect me, what are the long term aspects, and what if?  It has also taught me that I need to say "no" and not feel bad about it.  And to have compassion for myself for not knowing any better.  

The lessons in life are sometimes tougher than anything else.  I ask for help to remember what I now know and to act and be better in the future.  

Please learn from me so that you don't have to experience this in real life.

Abbondonza

This is a word from the Italian language meaning more than enough, plenty, abundance.  Abundance is having more than we need and want.

One of my teachers use to tell us that," we could have anything we wanted." Then he went on to add, "but where would you put it?"  There comes a huge responsibility with having everything.  

I love to fantasize about having a mansion.  What fun it would be to have all the space, having all of the closets, just having room to do whatever.  Then, I think about having to keep it clean and the fantasy just leaves.  

The truth is, I have all I need and want at this time.  Our home is very comfortable, easy to keep clean, and is very affordable.  Because I have "enough" I feel surrounded in abbondonza.  

Some of us need to be reminded that we have enough.  We are stimulated to "want" more than what we have when we watch the commercials on TV, or hear of wonderful sales, or when on social media, the ads show up with great deals.  I discipline myself with the "no more" stuff.  I am out of room to store it all.  I remember that I need to "go slow."  I no longer need to rush around "doing things, needing things, or having things."  I already live in abbondonza and all is well.  

Take the time to think about your life.  Think deeply.  Be grateful that you, too, live in abbondonza and that all is well.